Soon we will all have ten thousand channels of crisp 3D HD television. What will we be watching 24 hours a day? Here are 847 reasons to fear the future:

100 Snoring Elephants Couldn’t Drive Me Away
1-800-TEL-A-CON
3-Point Stance
5 O’clock Shadow Boxing
A Dolt Supervision
A Minute in the Life
A Parker Full of Posey
A Pigeon Tour of Italy
A Tale of Two Answers
A Tinkle of Despair
A! t.v.
Absolutely Stupid
Adventure Camping
Adventure Merchandise
Advertising Nauseum
Agent Duh
Alcohol & Archery
All Quizzes Great and Small
All the World’s Estranged
Amateur Barber Night
American Daydreams
Amish Beauty Pagent
An Eye for a Lie
Angster
Ann and Rex’s Dance Studio
Another Larry TV Show
Argggggghhhhhhh
ARTaFACT T.V.
As the World Burns
Ask Zilla
At Home with Henry
At Your Word
Atrocity Files
Aunt Bea and Nothingness
Aurora Boring Alice
Axt Jives
Baboon and LaRou
Bags’ Groove
Barb
Bard’s Bench
Barebottom Bob
Basking Bingo
Bean Counters
Beanie Boyd
Beat It! (In front of everybody)
Beauty Call
Bedtime for Bozo
Being and Fluffiness
Better Than Money
Bible Quest
Bicoastal Beth
Big Mother
Bigdude
Bindewald’s Kitchen
Bitterbug
BizKids
Blake’s Drakes
Blanching Amy
Blanet
Blog a Thong
Bloomsbury Pie
Bob Granite
Book Sense
Book Trials
Book Tube
Bookworms
Booty Base
Bora Bora Boar Hunt
Bored Beyond Repair
Born to Scrum
Bowel Detective
Bowels and Whistles
Box Boy
Bozo Jones
Brainard’s Brain
Brand Wagon
Break a Leg
Break the Clocks
Brood Storm
Brother Can You Paradigm?
Brown Nose Derby
Brunchilli
Budapest Priest
Buddha Bait
Buffalo Blue Chips
BUGBITER.COM
Buglemania
Building Blocks
Bull Tucker
Bulldog and Crotch
Bum Bait
Bunga Ding Dang
Bunny and Snide
Buster Boon
Butter, Grace and Gamble
Buy The Way
Buzz Factory
Buzzopia
Cadillackey
Call it Green
Campxotica
Canada Obscura
Candy Ask
Car Jaquelyn
Catarrh and Feathered
Category Foreplay
Chair Committee
Chalk and Stars
CHARLIETRAIN.COM
Chateau Yo
Chaucer’s Choice
Checkon, Checkoff
Chief Inspector
Christian Cuisine
Chuck Driver
Chum Bucket
Chunk City
Ciao Buddha
Cigars & Donuts – UFO and Paranormal Quarterly
Cigars and Donuts
Circumstantial Evidence
Claptrap Rap
Clash of the Titans (Game Show)
Clean-cut and Slobbery
Cockroach Survival
Cockroaching
Cod Sharks
Codger Quest
Codger’s Realm
Colony Clutch
Coming Down Boys?
Comrades
Conquer Consortium
Conquer Quest
Constance Cognoscenti
Constant Plank
Consumer Retorts
Contact Insanity
Control Freak-Show
Cookie Pagent
Cookin’ with Kate
Copywrong
Corncob and Lettucehead
Corndog and Kibble
Corporal Flank
Could Be Worse
Counter Top Culture
Cousin City
Cower Power
Coyote Junction
Crab and Kitten
Crutzle
Culture Squirrel
Cup and Chaucer
Cut and Copy
Cycling In the City
Daddy Now
Dag Nabbit
Damn Rabbit
Darwin 911
Darwin’s Lagoon
Debut Taunt
delArts t.v.
Delusion Oil
Deputy Debutante
Destination Destin
Deviltrope
DiChirico Family Album
Dick Shafter, Legal Eagle
Dictator Tots
Die Laughing
Digit Man
Dingers and Deadwood
Doc Mantra
Doctor Dose
Doctor Kudu
Doctor Misely
Doctor Waldo
Dolly Random
Don Bondage
Donde Esta Wavos Grandes?
Donnerdom
Dorm Stories
Dr. Gene Viscous
Dr. Mantra
Dr. Pan Ash
Dr. Prudent
Dr. Spin
Dream Trotters
Drew’s Militia
Drooling For Dollars
Dry Humor Cleaners
Dry Ice Diaries
Duckadoo
Dumber Than Dumb
Dwealth
East of Phoenix
Eat and Be Mary
eBachelors
Eccentric X’s
Eccentrifugal Force
Edge of Fear
El Dainty
Elder Rock
Emo Pigeon
End of the Road
Endangered Ethos
Enomen
Epicurious George
Exhibit A
Existential X
Exit Matter
Exoblue
ExoRace
ExoTheories
Exotic Performance
ExoTrek
Extinction Distinction
Family Brawl
Family Food
Family Forever
Family Olympics
Fanfare
Father Chutney
Father Pickle
FATSHOW.COM
Feast West
Fences of Flame
Fiddle and Twiddle
Filling Station
Find the Smell
Fire Writer
Fishbone and Maggie
Fishing With Gumby
Five O’clock Shadow
Floss and Eddy
Flossing with Children
Fluker
Flying Chaucer
Flying Freak
Focused Poker
Foie Gras for Dummies
Fonzi Scheme
Fooly Valued
Football Girl
Fortean Chef
Fox Faux
Fran Size
Frank Talk About Prawns
Frank Talk About Talking Frankly
Fraud Squad
Freakin
Friends of the Cthulhu
Fringe Factory
From Herd to There
Fun Gus
Funky Pilgrams
Funky Pilgrims
Futility Bill
Futurize
Fyodor Rant
General Delivery
Geology Loves Company
Get Off Your Aussie
Get on the Planet!
Get Ovet It
Get Ready for Beef Blanket Bingo!
Giant Bob
Giggle Hour
Girl Food
Girl Parts
Global Matrix
Go Girrl!
Go Ned!
Godzilla Family Almanac
Godzilla’s Playground
Good Dog, Bad Dog
Good Morning Mr. Boil
Good Mourning America
Goon Boon
Goosebump Factor
Grand Scale
Grandma God
Grandma’s Doily
Gray’s Matter
Greenspan’s Puppets
Gridlock
Grill
Grimm Moments
Groove Thang
Guns & Booze
Guru Cricket
H2 Show
Haiku Harry
Hard Landings
Hardy Voices
Hashed Browns and New Grounds
Have You Word?
Headstoners
Hear Me Out
Heart Worms
Heat of the Nite
Heather’s Bathroom
Hell Toupee
HeLo Lita
Hemingway and Hawing
Hemlock Roulette
Here comes the pun
Hickory Thackeray Duck
hipYouth
Hit and Amis
Hobroken
Hog Oscar
Homer Sapiens
Homeroom Boon
HomeWorld
Honk if you like money
Hoodie
Hooligan’s Island
Hop Along David Cassidy
Horse and Wells
Hot Box
House Full of Larry
HouseWorks
Hunt and Garter
Hurricane Hunter
I Do, I Do!
I Love Nothing!
I Was a Leaf Blower on the High Seas
Ian Bottomley, Drunken Plumber
InArt t.v.
Insanity Showcase
Inspector Jesus
Intergnat
Interknack
InterMedia
Intern, Turn, Turn
Internet Bubbly
Irehead
Irving Tustin
IsoTrek
Ito Lapinski – Skating Judge
It’s Aloud!
It’s Amagansett!
It’s Tracy!
Jack Addict
Jack and Sledge
Jacket Straight
Jackson Vile
Jalapeño Fire Waltz
Jamie’s Place
Janet Planet
Jason Alexanderplatz
Jason and Rotten
Jasper’s Job
Jay Cruder
Jeers
Jenny Plump
Joanie Loves Karachi
Joe, Todd & Me
Jonesing For Dollars
Judge Jeeter
Judge Stogie
Jung Wordsmiths in Love
Junkcrusher World
Just Say Know
Justin Time
Kafka’s Klues
Karachi Nights
Kill the Buddha
Kinder Rock
King Bling
King Grudge
Kingsnake and Eddie
Kissing Curmudgeons
Kitty McQueen
Lame Brain Surgery
Laser Man
Latchkey Kids
Latin Buttock Party
Lawton’s Village
Le Petit Chef
Lear and Kong
Leather and Chrome
Leaves of Crass
Let’s Talk Turducken!
Lickey Dude and Dancey
Lie Detector
Lingo Bingo
Loin Ranger
Lollilo Lolo
Lollytart
Lonely Hearts
Lord on the Rocks
Louis Bitterface
Louvre Shack
Lower Pacific Heights
Lutheran Luau
Luxury Realm
Mach Epoch
Maggie’s Molar
Major Mildred
Mandible Station
Mandrake
Mantis
Map of the Whirled
Mardithon
Marital Law
Marshall’s Law
Martha’s Rump Roast
Martin Walkingdoor, A.C.E.
Master Don
Mattermind
Mauve Lava
McWhorter’s Army
Media Mop
Media Pet
MediaNation
Medicate and Ashley
Mench Your Match
Metaphor Money
Mickey Big Mouth
Miles Womac
Millenium Sandwich
Milvia
Mirror Mirror
Mississippi Moments
Mister Manbubble
Mister Sister
Moby Quiz
Mock Epoch
Mod Cow
Molten Plaid
Mommy Doesn’t Know
Mona and Lisa
Mood Points
Morse’s Code
Mother Flickers’ Hot Spot
Mr Reno
Mr. Chaser
Mr. Demeanor
Mr. Kniebel
Mr. Mercurial
Mr. Mitrebox
Mr. Nancy
Mr. Rubber Room
Mr. Scoopy
Mr. Supervisor
Mr. Title Man
Mrs. Richard Ramirez
Mrs. Webley
Ms. Dialed
Mumblypeg the Pliable Python
Muttnick
My Bad
Nadine’s Apartment
Nantucket Nights
Native ET
Nature’s Wrath
New Age Gardner
New Gut
New Whirled
Newton Revisited
Nigel’s Pad
Nob Hill
Norse and Buggy
Nouveau Ruckus
Nude Attitude
Nuns and Nurses
Oh That Baby
On High
On Your Side
On Your Word
Operating Table
Opinion Minion
Origin of the Pisces
Original Sinbad
Otto Parker, Valet
Otto’s Kitchen
Out of the Box
Over the Horizon
Oxy Morons
Oy Vega
Panache
Paramix
Paving Your Dreams
Peace Unearth
Peanut Buddha and Jesus
Penelope’s Bathroom
Penultimate Sharpie
Peril
Periods of Rain
Pheromone Jones
Philosopher Stones
Piece Talks
Pigger
Pile Driven
Piss Intellect
Plain Tiff
Planet Health
Planet Ice
Pod Squad
Pollyantics
Potash & Gizzard
Poultry in Motion
Pray and Play
Prey for Piece
Prison Smarts
Professor Davey
Psycho Sis
Psychothon
Pump Up My Room
Pumping Station
Pundit Nolan
Puns and Needles
Pushups With Dogboy
Qatar and Feather
Quadzoonple
Question Quest
Questionable Behaivor
Quimby Heights
Quiz You Like It
Quizka
Quizmo
Quiznost
Rack Wars
Radiant Fresh
Radical Reptiles
Rap Doodle
Raw Ten
Read Like Hell!
Read My Lips
Real Resolutions
Real Estate Gossip
Recognizing the Truth
Red Nerve
Resorcerer
Rest in Peat
Retro-Yo
Rock Around the Block
Rock Oprah
Roofus Goofus
Saga Man
Saint Frigid’s Place
Salon Da Bomb
Samsonite and Dilbert
Sanchica de Ville
Sans the Dog
Sartepoint Counterpoint
Satelite Ranch
Saturday Night Lampoon
Scene Not Herd
Schoolio
Scream Games
Screaming Tuesday
Scrimshaw Magician
Sea Slug and Rabbit
Sea Spam
Second Chances
Second City Lampoon
Second Saturday Lampoon Show
Secrets of Turtle
Senior Division
SeniorGirl
Señor Serene
Seven Pillars of Quizdom
Sgt. Hooch
Shakes and Jitters
Shantytown Jesus
Shhh!
Shock and Almonds
Shopper’s Advocate
Shopper’s Helper
Shopping Watch
Show Me The Data
Show Me the Monkey
Show of Farce
Sideways at Best
Sigh Clone
Silicone Heads
Silly Coneheads
Silly Satan, Trix Aren’t for Kids
Silver Fox
Simply Gorge Us
Simply Home
Simply Satan
Sin n’ Spin
Sin Thesis
Sindromo
Sing Bling
Single Happiness
Sir Nuthead
Sister Griswald
Sister Resister
Slackered
Sleeper Waves
Slice of Life
Slingshot
Smart Ask
Smash and Grab
Smootch and Potato
Snark After Dark
Snide and Prejudiced
Snunting
So So Choritzo
So Young So Cruel
Solar Bingo
Soma Nights
Soul Kitch
Soul Kitsch
Soul You Know
SOULPUB.COM
Spavin
Speaking Your Minds
Speedbolt
Spend Your Way to a Million Dollars.
Spider and McFly
Spigothead
Spinoza Doctors
Spiritual Crasher
Spiritual Realms
Spong
Spontaneous Combustion
Spoon Fed Chatterbox
SportAbout
Square Pigs
Squeegee Spree
Station Arts
Steam Beat
Steps Into Living
Storm Patrol
Stormchasers
Storyeller
Stranded in the Present
Strange Attractors
Strange Tails
Strideline
StubbyTalk
Sugar and Price
Summer of the Shark
Sunrise to Sunset
Super Ciao
Super Cize
Surgery Blues
Survival of the Fattest
Svelt Smelt
Syndrome and Katie
Syndromo
Tae Bozo
Tag Teen
Taliban Toddler
Talkin’ God
Talking about Speech
Tall Tales and Nightingales
Taxidermy Todd
Teacher’s Pet
Telebitch
Telecide
Telethong
Temporary Larry
Tender Ties
Tennyson Alley
Terra Cotta Jones
TerraQuest
Terror Quest
Thar Hills
The 24-7
The Achilles Tendency
The Anti Matters
The Atomizer
The Backslappers
The Backyard Chef
The Bottlenecks
The Bottom Feeders
The Boy Who Whined Duck
The Brime
The Bumpkins
The Captain and Toenail
The Chopper’s Block
The Consumer Reporter
The Consumer’s Advocate
The Cranky’s
The Degree of Being
The Deuce
The eGirls
The end result for whom all of us goldfish toll.
The Fidget
The Fifi Files
The Flippants
The French Detective
The Go Lucky
The Good Nothin’s
The Gush Puppets
The Hermit Wars
The Hipster’s Heavenly Hoedown
The Hollywood Eleven
The Inheritors
The Jackettes
The John Davidson Hour
The Jones
The Kiddie Koroner
The Know Show
The Lunch
The Madding Crowd
The Moaning of Life
The Mongers
The National Lampoon Radio Hour Revival
The Nature of Nurture
The Naughts
The Nine
The Nurture Channel
The Odd Squad
The One-Up
The Oughts
The Ozone Chronicles
The Pace of Success
The Panky
The Patient English
The Pavery
The Portion
The Remnants
The Right Eye
The Road to Old
The Royal Tease
The Savvy Shopper
The Sheriff of New York
The Shopmaster
The Shopping Report
The Snub
The Source
The Sport of Ace-King
The Sterilizers
The Straight and Narrow
The Sumps
The Time Lady
The Tomorrow Report
The Topic of Cancer
The Turn
The Wellborne
The Winchester Sisters
The Wizard of Ozzie
The X-Zone
The Yesterday Guy
The Young and the Useless
The Zero Days
The Zeroes
Thirst and Howl
This Damn Planet
This is Your Wife
Thriving with Botox
Thriving with Viagra
Throng-a-Thon
Tic Tac Toenail
Tick Talk
Tickle Town
Tim’s Buck Tooth
Tippy
Todd Squad
Toe Taggin’
Tofu Magician
Tone Bone
Tongue in Chic
Tony Mutton
Toot Boot
Tori Tori Tori
Tort Resort
Touch Zone
Travelation
Trefoil McName
Trial Files
Trollope the Competition
Tropic of Answer
Truth or Consecration
Truth or Darian
Truth or Darren
Truth or Derriere
Tsunami Tsally
Tumblerbums
Turduck and Cover
Two Birds
Tybalt and Glen
Ulti-Mate
Ultra Mouse
Unit One-Eleven
Up Your Sleeve
Upper Dinero
Vera Real
Vicious Suave
Victor Shaft – Lewd Lawyer
Vintage Violence
Virgil and Stardust
Virile Files
Voodles
Voodude Ranch
Waisting Away
Walking Rwanda
Wall Street on 100 Shares a Day
Wannabe Heights
War Jonesing
War of Attrition
Washed-Up Wannabes
Watch Your Aussie!
Watts Happening
Waugh Waugh Waugh
Weeeeeeeeeee
Welcome Back Qatar
Wells’ Farrago
West Snide Story
What John Davidson Won’t Do for Money
What Would It Take Or What Would You Pay? (gameshow)
What You Won’t Do For Money
What’s the Word?
What’s Up Your Nose?
When the forgetful undertaker stamps his feet all the dead have chattering teeth.
Where’s Daddy?
Where’s Jane?
Where’s the Biscuit?
Whimperdean
Whitewater Cowboys
Who Art in Heaven
Who Wants To Be An Idiot?
Wild Strife
Will Drink for Food
Win a Bagel
Withering Slights
Withstand and Deliver
Word Nightly
Word Patrol
WordFrame
Wordly Wise
WordMakers
WordQuizzers
Words in the Waugh
Words to the Wise
Work Flirt
Xsports
Xurban Arts
Yada Quest
Yo Yorkshire
Yogasm
You Gonna Eat That?
Your Shopping Buddy
Zap Shack
Zeen Scene
Zilla and Rex
Zizzy
Zoom t.v.