Happy Falloween: It's not quite Halloween yet, but it's not too early and it's never too late to get into the spirit of the holiday. In the current issue of Time, Michael Elliott's essay, Boo, Humbug! laments that:
Americans will spend about $6.9 billion on Halloween this year, $2 billion on candy alone, an extra $1.5 billion on costumes and much of the rest on decorations and doodads. Don't get me started on outfits for pets or the move to extend the holiday into an event that runs for a whole season so that it becomes you'll love this -- "Falloween."
But, it's not just the cultural anthropologists who might cringe with the commercialization of this hallowed feast into the shopping season of Falloween.
In Word Spy, cultural etymologist Paul McFedries explains the origins of this new word:
This term unites the words fall and Halloween to recognize the lengths to which many people now go to celebrate the latter. (I think most people know the origin of Halloween. Just in case, it was originally Hallow-e'en or Hallowe'en, a contraction of All-Hallow-Even, the night before All Hallows Day "now All Saints Day" which is November 1.) If you saw houses bedecked with pumpkins and skulls and cobwebs a couple of weeks ago, then you know those people are fully immersed in the Falloween thing.
Posted by
abnu on Thursday, October 30, 2003 @ 6:45 AM
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Proclamation: It has come to my attention that this is a special week in some countries where Wordlab is read:
NOW, THEREFORE, I, GEORGE W. BUSH, President of the United States of America, by virtue of the authority vested in me by the Constitution and laws of the United States, do hereby proclaim October 26 through November 1, 2003, as Protection From Pornography Week. I call upon public officials, law enforcement officers, parents, and all the people of the United States to observe this week with appropriate programs and activities.
In compliance with orders from above, certain recent posts mentioning unmentionable body parts have been re-dated.
Concerned that such date changes to this blog might be regarded as revisionism by Internet purists, we sought guidance from the White House and were assured that it's done all the time to avoid embarrassment.
Posted by
abnu on Wednesday, October 29, 2003 @ 1:39 PM
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Now With Smaller Breasts: KFC is launching a new advertising campaign to emphasize the healthy aspects of deep fried chicken. Years after dropping the "Kentucky Fried" moniker in favor of the healthier acronym KFC, the Colonel's secret is out -- it's not fast food. It's health food.
Meanwhile, Pamela Anderson is calling for a boycott of KFC using the power and influence of PETA (People for the Ethical Treatment of Animals). Ms. Anderson is upset, apparently, that those are real breasts that KFC is boiling in oil. By the way, all natural Pam uses extra virgin olive oil.
Posted by
abnu on Saturday, October 25, 2003 @ 12:07 AM
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Branding Cock-up. It's well known that words can have different meanings in different countries, but I was surprised to find this in the canoe:
It's game over for the Buick LaCrosse in Canada. A General Motors executive yesterday admitted that the future Buick model -- which is set to debut late next year -- will be re-named in Canada after GM learned LaCrosse is a Quebec slang term for masturbation.
I've been masturbating in Canada all my life, sometimes in Québec, and I've never called it lacrosse! The Canadian Lacrosse Association is recognized as the governing body responsible for all aspects of Canada's National Summer Sport. Who knew masturbating is a national sport in Canada?
It makes one wonder how a name like LaCrosse, as a Buick automotive brand, could possibly cause any excitement in Canada. Maybe someone was just having a good one on GM Vice Chairman, Bob Lutz, visiting Canada and it will turn out to be another urban legend. Or will it be called a Buick LaCroix au Canada? Incroyable!
Posted by
abnu on Friday, October 24, 2003 @ 2:16 AM
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Dumb Blonde No Joke: Jessica Simpson caught the attention of Chicken of the Sea® brand tuna when she mangled the company name on her MTV reality show, Newlyweds, saying, "Is this chicken? ... or is this fish? I know it's tuna, but it says Chicken by the Sea." Trademark lawyers vowed they'd screw her, if asked; but the ad guys were all over her, without question.
Watch for Jessica Simpson to replace the aging Chicken of the Sea® mermaid, whose jingle, "Ask any Mermaid You Happen to See... What's the Best Tuna? Chicken of the Sea®!" has been a steady diet for fifty friggin' years.
Is Jessica Simpson the perfect spokesblonde to update the Chicken of the Sea® brand, up against Bumblebee® and Starkist® tuna? It doesn't matter whether you think she's an utter moron, or if you find her udderly appealing. It doesn't matter that she doesn't have good taste; she tastes good,Charlie!
Posted by
abnu on Thursday, October 23, 2003 @ 11:19 PM
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Swapping More Than Music: With an open mouth kiss, Britney Spears and Madonna swapped their Brand DNA in a public sex act at the MTV Music Awards – the ultimate marketing orgy, and the pro-creation of two new music brands.
To appreciate what's really going on when the former Princess of Pop is taken under the wing of the music industry's proverbial Material Girl, take a good look and listen to what's been happening with brand development of hip hop recording artists:
Like-minded artists always have been drawn to each other creatively and professionally, but only in hip-hop do you see such fervent collaboration. While some of the magnetism bringing the artists together is shared admiration and friendship, the overall purpose is generally more business-minded.
Although not overt, what's going on in hip-hop is quite revolutionary. And it's forcing the rest of the music industry to reconsider their own potential for self-promotion.
Hip-hop has created what might be the ideal business model for networking and branding. Over the years, certain luminaries have emerged and become godfathers of hip-hop, CEOs of a sort.
...
But the business plan of presenting protege after protege via mad collaborations isn't one that will likely be adopted by other genres, mostly because it's a tactic that is specific to hip-hop.
In recent years, we've seen that tactic used to crossover hip hop to mainstream music audiences; such as Dre's authentication of Eminem and, more recently, Timbaland's reincarnation of Justin Timberlake. Brands don't always cross genres, or generations, without a glitch.
But the cross-branding strategy is moving beyond hip hop. Madonna is the godmother of popular music, and the calculated move to cross-fertilize her brand with Britney is not just Madonna continuing to reinvent herself. It is the creation of a brand new Britney. Tonight, Britney Spears launches her new video, Me Against The Music, featuring Madonna. Listen up and see that this is not your little sister's Britney Spears, or your father's Madonna.
Posted by
abnu on Wednesday, October 22, 2003 @ 11:19 PM
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Slave Drivers Wanted: Eschewing the alphabet soup of names for Sport Utility Vehicles, Volkswagen passed on the obvious SUVW moniker. Instead, the marketing executives at VW chose a bold new name, Touareg, which Car & Driver reviewed and described as a "luxury sedan with a mountain-goat attitude" built on the same platform as the Porsche Cayenne.
That sounds exciting. However, at Wordlab we don't review automobiles; we review their names. So, where on Igor's Taxonomy of SUV Names would you expect to find Touareg? Is it an invented name or an evocative name? How would you score the name Touareg on a scale of -2 to +5 on your taxonometer? Apparently, it's pronounced twah-reg or tour-egg or something like that, depending on who's talking. Does pronunstipation matter? Would you consider the etymology of the word? Does the name come with more baggage than the vehicle can carry?
Fortune Magazine dug up the dirt on the name Touareg, and reports:
Look at the trouble Volkswagen has run into after deciding to name its new SUV after a tribe of Saharan nomads that dates to the 11th century: the Touaregs (sometimes spelled "Tuaregs"). The tribe is known in Europe for its ability to survive in hostile environments, a perfect quality for an SUV, or so VW reasoned. But it turns out that while the Touaregs have some picturesque customs (men wear blue veils in the presence of women and carry intricate swords), they historically followed another, less attractive one: They were notorious slave owners and traders until the beginning of the 20th century.
For VW dealers in the U.S., who had already voiced their objections to the obscure, hard-to-pronounce name "they preferred something catchier, like SUVW" the slavery issue added injury to insult. German executives insisted on staying the course. "We deplore any society's past history of slavery," says a U.S. spokesman for VW. "Unfortunately, nearly all cultures have it in their pasts, including our own."
I don't think we'll be seeing Tiger Woods in a Touareg anytime soon.
Posted by
abnu on Sunday, October 19, 2003 @ 3:50 PM
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Real Friends Tickle: Emode, the premier destination for personality tests and matchmaking online, hired Igor to name their new social network, which launched today as Tickle. Says Igor:
The fast emerging and highly competitive social network sector is populated with mostly descriptive names, such as Friendster, Friendspot, people2people, Six Degrees, Zero Degrees, Everyone's Connected, ITSNOTWHATYOUKNOW and Visible Path. Other names include Rhyze and Huminity, which defy rhyme, reason and classification.
As always, we were looking for the one name that worked on as many levels as possible. In this case, the name simply had to be fun, human, memorable, distinctive, relevant yet non-descriptive, able to be used as a verb, capture the attention of the world, support the company's positioning, provide them with a deep well of marketing/advertising imagery and language going forward, tap into the hearts and minds of their audience in a unique way, give them a strong competitive advantage, and be a compelling advertisement in and of itself, as well as the usual requirements that it be short, memorable, and loaded with meaning. And of course it had to be available from both a trademark and a domain name perspective.
After carefully examining every possibility in every known language, it became clear that Tickle was the perfect name for a new social network.
Also see Igor's newly posted Social Networks Name Taxonomy for a detailed look at the names in this sector and how they match up.
Posted by
Jay on Wednesday, October 15, 2003 @ 5:25 PM
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Dear Abby: Someone at the bank might be sleeping with the branding consultant. Should we blow the whistle?
The branding revamp, which will incur £11m of costs plus consultants' fees of £500,000, (US$833,920) will change the bank's name for the first time since Abbey National was founded in a 1944 merger of the Abbey Road and National building societies.
Abbey National's red brand signs will be replaced by "abbey" in blue, green, orange or pink. Branches will be refurbished. The company will continue to be registered and listed as Abbey National.
So, let's get this straight. For nearly a million dollars in consulting fees, the branding advice is to shorten the name from Abbey National to just "abbey" and replace red brand signs with blue, green, orange or pink. Stop using the slogan, "Get the Abbey habit." But, keep the company name registered and listed as Abbey National. And, the big branding idea for the bank -- talk to customers in plain English. In case you missed the special effects of this million dollar rebranding effort linked on the bank's corporate website, take a good look. This is designed to "turn banking on its head."
Edward Firth, analyst at Credit Lyonnais, said: "What this reeks of is somebody who's spent a fortune on consultants." Really? It's happened before.
Another banker said: "I do not think anybody in the industry will be losing sleep over this tonight. Abbey is not going to get new customers by putting frosted fronts on branches. Banks succeed or fail on their pricing."
Effectively branding its position in all markets as the value leader, ING proves the point that branding is not about getting your customers to choose you over your competition. It's about getting them to see you as the only choice.
Posted by
abnu on Tuesday, October 14, 2003 @ 4:46 PM
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The State of Automotive Branding:Colorado is the state of the art of truck branding, according to General Motors. The Chevrolet Colorado, a new midsize truck, replaces the Chevy S-10 line in a move away from a functional name to an evocative name. Such branding distinctions are remarked and charted by the naming and branding gurus at Igor, who recently published a Taxonomy of Sport Utility Vehicle (SUV) Names.
Dora Nowicki, marketing manager for Chevy Colorado says, "We take a lot of ribbing: Why not the Iowa? Or the Utah?" But the Centennial State stereotype, she says, fits perfectly with what the Detroit company is selling. "People who live in Colorado are active, fit, athletic; they enjoy the environment and want to preserve it," Nowicki says. "They need a vehicle to get them to the top of the mountain, and the Colorado clearly fits into the lifestyle. We think it's a cool name."
Cooler than a Montana minivan.
Posted by
abnu on Monday, October 13, 2003 @ 8:01 PM
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Holy Condoms, Batman: The Catholic Church is telling people in countries stricken by Aids not to use condoms because they have tiny holes in them through which the HIV virus can pass - potentially exposing thousands of people to risk. The church is making the claims across four continents despite a widespread scientific consensus that condoms are impermeable to the HIV virus. The church's claims are revealed in a BBC1 Panorama programme, Sex and the Holy City, to be broadcast on Sunday.
According to a Special Report on Aids in the Guardian, the World Health Organisation has condemned the Vatican's views, saying: "These incorrect statements about condoms and HIV are dangerous when we are facing a global pandemic which has already killed more than 20 million people, and currently affects at least 42 million." The WHO says "consistent and correct" condom use reduces the risk of HIV infection by 90%. There may be breakage or slippage of condoms - but not, the WHO says, holes through which the virus can pass.
According to a sex health education website at Michigan State University, the trick is putting the condom on properly. MSU's slogan: Advancing Knowledge. Transforming Lives. October is national AIDS Awareness Month.
It was about time we did something to sex up the front page of Wordlab, don't ya think?
Posted by
abnu on Friday, October 10, 2003 @ 2:53 AM
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SHIT for brains: New technology is putting the pads on at Virginia Tech football practices this season. Four players will be wearing helmets equipped with six sensors, which fit into the top of the helmet like a hair net. The sensors will monitor the impact on a player's head during a collision. The wireless system, called Simbex Head Impact Telemetry System (HIT System), can analyze the frequency and severity of each impact. Also, it can keep a record to help in the evaluation and treatment of head injuries, according to this article in USA Today. The article isn't news today, but it's topical because quark is in a college football state of mind, and Colorado is plagued by sports injuries going into Saturday's game against Kansas.
Posted by
abnu on Thursday, October 09, 2003 @ 1:01 AM
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And FWIW abnu, Kansas +6 1/2 looks good this week against Colorado...methinks.
Posted by
Michael Davey on Wednesday, October 08, 2003 @ 10:08 PM
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Kansas, it's no place like home: Click your heels, Toto. Kansas tourism and business leaders are trying to figure out how to market this state. They're looking for a brand, an image, that encompasses the diversity of Kansas.
The task of defining that image goes to the Commerce Department, where Scott Allegrucci the state's tourism director works. He has set aside $300,000 from the agency's budget to find the right image. I wish I was in Kansas. I wish I was in Kansas.
Tennessee Sounds Good To Me: But the state slogan doesn't sound good to Governor Phil Bredesen who says, "There's nothing that brands Tennessee in a phrase like that." So, the first-year governor and his commissioner of tourism, the former marketing director of Dollywood, want to change the official slogan for Tennessee. Admittedly, some state slogans do sound better than others.
Perhaps the most lovable slogan initiated by a state is I Love New York, which has served to endear us to The Big Apple as well as the State of New York over a period of more than a quarter century.
The longest continuous state tourism development campaign that is tied to a slogan is Virginia is for Lovers, which has branded the Commonwealth of Virginia since 1969. But tourism development is only part of the economic lifeblood for most states, so Virginia's slogan has been leveraged in recent years in the slogan Virginia is for Business -- call it brand extension.
Wisconsin is for Cheeseheads doesn't sound like a particularly great slogan for the state (and it's not); with all due respect to the phenomenal Green Bay Packers, who are loved statewide and beyond. So, it's not surprising that people in the State of Wisconsin have huddled recently at Curly's Pub at Lambeau Field to develop a game plan for the heady issues concerning the state branding, which has been a political football for a few years.
The Brand Called Wisconsin is the title of a very thoughtful White Paper presented at an Economic Summit at the University of Wisconsin a few years ago by Marsha Lindsay, CEO of the Madison (not the Avenue) advertising agency Lindsay, Stone & Briggs. It's a "must read" for anyone seriously interested in branding at the state level.
Posted by
abnu on Monday, October 06, 2003 @ 11:20 PM
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Sin City: It was no mirage the other night when a white tiger dragged Siegfried's Roy off stage by the neck in a spectacle many of the 1500 guests, including children, first thought was just part of the act. Sadly, it was all too real and Roy Horn remains in critical condition and the Siegfried and Roy show, which was synonymous with family-friendly Las Vegas, is dead.
Truth be told, Vegas has officially moved away from its attempt in the '90s to reposition the city as a "family entertainment center." The "family friendly" illusion was not true to the brand of the gamblers' city founded by the mob, which has become the fastest growing city in the USA on the strength of tourist dollars. In the face of dwindling gambling revenue, new tourist attractions are of the adult entertainment variety, from the strip clubs off The Strip to the Sirens of Treasure Island with scantily clad women who are replacing the venue's buccaneers of yesteryear, to Cirque du Soleil's Zumanity ("for guests 18 years old and older") that features nude performers and lusty same-sex romance on the flying trapeze. The MGM Grand has closed its "Child Activity Center" and is now promoting a cocktail lounge where waitresses hold customers' shot glasses between their breasts. (Note to our regulars, Tipple and Kenny Lingus: Plan next Wordlab Meetup in Vegas.)
What's most interesting to the rest of us is the change in the official slogan for Las Vegas, the erotic fantasyland: What Happens Here, Stays Here. The new slogan is the centerpiece of a $25 Million Dollar ante for a new advertising campaign to reposition the city's image. The new commercials are about "freedom" and "expressing yourself," according to Billy Vassiliades, whose company, R&R Partners, created the ads. "They're about releasing your own inhibitions and about creating your own fantasies." The ads depict a Las Vegas that is an adults-only destination, and one with an X-rating that city officials hope will appeal to a new generation of visitor.
Las Vegas isn't the only city that is looking to revamp its image with a "city slogan" that reflects the aspirations of city councillors or new urban realities: demographic, psychographic, and economic. But, rarely do politicians have the capabilties to articulate such a vision or to connect with the true brand character of their city, as have the civic leaders in Las Vegas who engaged professional brand consultants to create the new slogan. All too often, politicians create a "committee" of well-meaning local folks to come up with a slogan that meets everyone's ideas of an appropriate city brand.
Case in point: Pittsburgh. You're thinking steel city, right? Well, Pittsburgh's strength isn't steel anymore. (Don't tell the Steelers.) The "Image Gap Committee" that's backing Pittsburgh's efforts to articulate its brand, comprised of 20 regional development groups with a steering committee of nearly three dozen people, came up with this "suck sinked" statement of their brand:
"Just as the steel from which it draws its roots, Pittsburgh has an authenticity and durability that provides a strong foundation, yielding new opportunities to grow and succeed. The amalgamation of our resources draws people together to a place where ideas are invented and transformed."
When these 120 people decided that Pittsburgh's identity could best be summarized and marketed with a 12-word "core theme" and a 16-word "brand promise," New York ad man John Athorn was one of the first to criticize the effort. He said the wordy messages were "really designed more to obfuscate and confuse than to clarify." Not exactly I Love New York. But the question was, think a New York marketing communications firm could do any better? Athorn decided to give it a free try. He and his staff spent late April and the early part of May coming up with an alternative approach to the "branding" of Pittsburgh. They emerged with a 16-page story board proposal built around the steel-plated theme of Pittsburgh Strong and a quote from Shakespeare -- To Thine Own Self Be True.
With iron-willed civic mindedness, the "Image Gap Committee" (sometimes called the "cornflakes committee") voted to reject this professional proposal.
Other cities face similar challenges balancing political expedience with creative experience. It will be interesting to watch the development of new slogans for cities such as Baltimore and Denver, among all the others.
Posted by
abnu on Sunday, October 05, 2003 @ 11:13 PM
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Do an act of kindness - help one person smile: Harvey Ball created the Smiley Face as we know it today for the State Mutual Life Assurance Cos. of America. The first Smileys were made into pins and handed out to employees and clients of the company that hired Ball to create a morale booster. He was paid a grand total of $45. for his original design. He never applied for a trademark or copyright and never regretted it.
“Never in the history of mankind or art has any single piece of art gotten such widespread favor, pleasure, enjoyment, and nothing has ever been so simply done and so easily understood in art.” - Harvey Ball, inventor of the smiley face.
But according to Ball, "Smiley has become so commercialized that its original message of spreading good will and good cheer has all but disappeared. I needed to do something to rescue and restore that message. So I started the World Smile Corporation". Along with this Ball also started World Smile Day, the first friday of October, every year -- a day for good cheer and deeds.
Posted by
abnu on Friday, October 03, 2003 @ 11:14 AM
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Baby Jeebus and Julie Annie Giuliani: Never have New Yorkers been reinventing themselves at the rate they are now, according to the city's official moniker monitor. Recently Dalton Conley, a New York sociologist, continued his family's experimentation with the psychological effects on children of unique naming by officially changing his son's name to "Yo Xing Heyno Augustus Eisner Alexander Weiser Knuckles Jeremijenko Conley" although his friends continue to call him Yo Conley. Yo's sister was experimentally blessed with the moniker E on the theory that she might have her own ideas about whether she's really an Eve or Elizabeth or Ellen or maybe Eveready.
According to a recent article in news.com.au, there's a new trend toward naming children after product brands, like Timberland, Chanel, Camry, Jaguar, Bentley, Canon and even Xerox, as the number of American parents spurning traditional first names rises sharply. According to the most recent census, at least 10,000 different names are now in use, two-thirds of which were largely unknown before World War II.
Edward Callary, a past president of the American Names Society, thinks that a determination to be different is the hallmark of the current generation of young parents: "The more we feel defined by numbers, in our postal codes and bank statements, the more we need to shout out a unique name into the world." Apparently, at least 24 kids have been named Unique.
Musicians and songwriters have long been creative in the naming of their children. Free spirited Sonny & Cher named the fruit of their union, Chastity. Frank Zappa named his daughter Moon Unit and his son Dweezil. Lenny Kravitz and Lisa Bonet had Zoe Moon. David Bowie begat Zowie Bowie. Sting (not his real name) has a half dozen offspring, among them girls named Fuschia and Michael. Shania and Mutt have Eja. Madonna has Lourdes. And there are more weird names of musicians' and other celebrities' children, if you can imagine names more weird.
In a great little post on Blogcritics about finding the perfect baby name, Dawn Olsen writes, "I know this is silly, but a name is important. It defines you, helps in creating your experiences, your past, present and future..." So, it shouldn't come as a surprise that every Tom, Dick and Harry in the world has gone to bed with Paris Hilton.
Posted by
abnu on Thursday, October 02, 2003 @ 1:49 PM
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Note the cool Fine Print: The content found on WordLab
is free to the world. Although we cannot guarantee that any of this
content is not already in use by someone, somewhere, on this planet
who may have seen it on this Web site or created it independently of
our Web site, we have made a reasonable effort to give you what we believe
to be original names and slogans and generally good stuff. Use what
you will of our content since it is here for the taking. However, if
you decide to use one of our names for a commercial activity, and since
we have no assurance that the name may not already be in use by someone
else as a trademark, domain name or otherwise, we strongly suggest that
you take appropriate legal precautions, such as seeing a lawyer. In
short, any necessary due diligence is up to you, but we at least make
no claims on your potential future dream name. We merely ask that if
you do decide to use any of our content, that you please send us an
email ["word at wordlab dot com"] about it for use in our
internal records and eplosive marketing campaigns. Thank you, and enjoy.
Real Friends Tickle: Emode, the premier destination for personality tests and matchmaking online, hired Igor to name 
